Broken

I keep reading all these news stories and watching all these video clips from people who were effected by the Sandy Hook Elementary School Shooting. It will be a day remembered for the rest of my life, as well as millions of others.

I hate all the attention that the killer is getting. I feel like we shouldn't even put his name in the news. What's the point? I really feel like the kids, teachers, parents, and families should be the subject of our thoughts. The real life heros. 

I'm so heartbroken for the families. For the past two days, every time I get a silent moment with one of my kids, I cry. I think of how hard it is being a mother but I would never give it up for anything because it is the most rewarding calling I've ever had. I love my kids just as much as those parents who lost a child loves theirs. I know that my sorrow from "What if's" and things does not even compare to the heartbreak they are feeling.

This is one of the many trials that I'm not sure I could live through... But I hope these people will continually turn to their Heaven Father for comfort. He loves us so much. I'm so grateful of the knowledge I have of eternal families. It must help heal knowing you will see your children and be together with them again one day. I'm so grateful for my family. My kids. My husband. I'll be forever thankful that I get to have my family for an eternity if I only live faithfully. It's tragedies like these that help you realize what's important in life. 

Heaven as a few more sweet spirits back and I'm sure they were greeted with hugs, love and tears. My only hope is that the families left behind find some comfort soon.    

 twas' 11 days before Christmas, around 9:38

when 20 beautiful children stormed through heaven's gate.

their smiles were contagious, their laughter filled the air.

they could hardly believe all the beauty they saw there.

they were filled with such joy, they didn't know what to say.

they remembered nothing of what had happened earlier that day.

"where are we?" asked a little girl, as quiet as a mouse.

"this is heaven." declared a small boy. "we're spending Christmas at God's house."

when what to their wondering eyes did appear,

but Jesus, their savior, the children gathered near.

He looked at them and smiled, and they smiled just the same.

then He opened His arms and He called them by name.

and in that moment was joy, that only heaven can bring

those children all flew into the arms of their King

and as they lingered in the warmth of His embrace,

one small girl turned and looked at Jesus' face.

and as if He could read all the questions she had

He gently whispered to her, "I'll take care of mom and dad."

then He looked down on earth, the world far below

He saw all of the hurt, the sorrow, and woe

then He closed His eyes and He outstretched His hand,

"Let My power and presence re-enter this land!"

"may this country be delivered from the hands of fools"

"I'm taking back my nation. I'm taking back my schools!"

then He and the children stood up without a sound.

"come now my children, let me show you around."

excitement filled the space, some skipped and some ran.

all displaying enthusiasm that only a small child can.

and i heard Him proclaim as He walked out of sight,

"in the midst of this darkness, I AM STILL THE LIGHT."

Written by Cameo Smith, Mt. Wolf, PA

Confessions.

I haven't done my confessional in quite sometime. So here we go.

Confessions of an Unbalanced Woman:

1. I love the idea of getting great gifts and making great gifts... But I always procrastinate and then it's crunch time and I hate it. I'm working on that though. Already way ahead of where I was last year.... but still behind. 
2. Paul got his Christmas gift(s) early. An xbox, and two dumb games. I hate the games. He's not allowed to play them in front of the kids.
3. I was supposed to be on this strict diet so that I'd have a hot bod (or something close to it) by next Saturday when Stacie does our family pictures. hwejhtkljryuki
   Oops. That was me wiping my Oreo crumbs off the keyboard. 
4. Abby drives. me. nuts. I wanna beat her and hug her all at the same time. Especially when she comes out of her bed 10 times asking for a headband.... because she can't remember that it's called a band-aid. 
5. I hate to mop. Mopping is so dumb. And then I moved into a house where 85% of the floors are tile. That, my friends, is an epic fail. 
6. I yell at my kids. Dumb. I hate it. It's a knee-jerk reaction. Sometimes I yell at my kids and realize my tone of voice and I'm embarrassed for myself. This is going to be a new years resolution. 
7. My kids are seriously awesome. Thend
8. I almost gave in and bought a fake tree this year. I h.a.t.e. fake trees. Not the way they look, because you really can't tell. It's all the fluffing and assembling and lack of smelling. Blah. We have prelit garland above our cabinets and I already loathe it. This is the first year we've had it. 
9. I really wanted to send out this picture (see above) for our Christmas Cards... But I couldn't even count on one hand the people that would have judged me. Moty for sure. So there. Now I get to pretend that it was my Christmas Card. 

That's all for today. 

The Sweetest Boy I Ever Did See

My sweet baby is ONE! It makes me so sad to say that. I don't know what it is about my kids getting older that makes me so sad because I love them more (almost) every day! 

Jared is such a sweetie. He has dimples to melt your soul and and belly laugh that will make even the grumpiest person smile. 

Some fun things about Jared:

• He has 5 teeth now! The last one just came in after his birthday. Yay for slow, painful teeth! :/
• He weighs 21 lbs..... aaand that's all I can remember.. (moty)
• He walks! He thinks it's so fun to walk around with a toy/phone/remote control in hand. He walks best when he isn't walking towards someone who is cheering him on. Otherwise, he gets too excited and biffs it. :)
• He says mama, dada and makes a variety of other vowel sounds trying to say other things. He also is an expert in the language of Caveman. 
• Jared has a teeny temper tantrum that makes me laugh. His sad faces are the saddest and it's so hard to resist scooping him up and kissing his face! 
• He LOVES his mommy and daddy. I love this so much. If either one of us are gone for more than a couple hours, he is SO excited to see us when we come back. 
• Best of all, he loves Abby to death. He's her little shadow. He lets her tackle him (if he is well rested), love on him, tickle him... If she wants to play with him, he will play any game she wants. 

We are so blessed to have Jared in our family! I can't imagine our family without this crazy kid.