Saturday, May 26, 2012

Because I'm so in Love

I've been sitting at this desk for nearly an hour now. Today we were at my MIL and FILs house with the family celebrating Memorial Day. No, this post as nothing to do with that
Anyway.
I've been sitting here for about an hour trying to get a better grasp of this lesson I'm supposed to teach tomorrow. Jared has been having  a hard time with sleeping at night for the past... well 7 months. (Happy 7 mo birthday to him today, by the way.) So as I sit here, he's been crying for around 45 minutes of the hour.
Back up.
Life has been particularly stressful the past little while. We moved into a new house, we moved back into the Dallas Stake, we moved back into our old ward (well half of it, because it's split), Abby has m.a.s.t.e.r.e.d. the terrible twos, Jared tends to cry... a lot (tyvm acid reflux, dairy intolerance and regular frustrations of an infant with the inability to get your body to do what you want it to. i.e. crawl, get toys in your mouth, etc), our house has been a mess whether it be from boxes, clutter, or every day messes, my friends seem so far away now and although I get to keep them forever, it's time to make new friends here as well.
When ever life gets hard, I find it kind of amusing to think back to before we had kids, sometimes before we were even married. I thought life was hard. We both worked, went to school, lived in different towns, and never thought we saw enough of each other. But really, who am I kidding. We both made plenty of money for our needs, had hardly any expenses and saw each other several times a week. I got to sleep as long as I possibly wanted at night, I was able to buy just about anything I wanted within reason, my car was hardly ever covered in gold fish and toys. I've had a lot of hard days lately=a  lot of entertaining the (ahem) "good times".
So. I'm still sitting here. Jared has been crying for(ever) a while. I've been in and out of there trying to get him to sleep, and now he's finally sleeping. The last time I went in there, I nursed him while he laughed at me. His little giggles melt my heart even when  I'm at my worst. They really are the sweetest music I could ever hear. I rocked him to sleep after he was done and just watched his little eyes close, his sweet body relax, and enjoyed the silence. It wasn't long before that silence was uninterrupted by my thoughts (go figure). Where would I be without this sweet boy?
Right next door is my pain-in-the-rear two year old. She is so stubborn and drives me crazy with questions, messes, tantrums... She also pushes me over the edge with love- Her smile, her big gorgeous eyes, her ability to catch onto things so quick, her hugs, her "I love you mommy!"s and "Thank you mommy!"s, her sweet kisses, the way she adores her little bother, and the way she lights up when she discovers that daddy is home.
What would I be without these two special, wonderful kids in my life? Totally incomplete.
I love them with my everything. I love these nights when I would much rather be asleep because I'm so annoyed with life and rocking a baby sends me a reality check. There is no place I'd rather be. I can say that with my whole heart.
        I am so in love..

3 comments:

Simply Sarah *K* said...

Love ya, Marhls!

Danielle said...

definitely love ya!

Jennilee said...

cute!! sorry its hard, but the good times are good thats for sure